Interview with Doreen Virtue and Dr. Steven Farmer: Finding Your Twin Flame | Four Corners Magazine
February 28, 2005
Four Corners Magazine (FCM): How do you know if you’ve found your true twin flame?
Doreen Virtue (DV): Your Twin flame has a great deal in common with you and you will keep crossing paths in your life. It’s the same in both twin flame and soul mate relationships—there is a feeling of instant familiarity, like you’ve known the person forever. There’s also a deep comfort level with the person like the most comfortable jeans you’ve ever worn. The other thing is the “eyes”. There’s something in their eyes.
Steven Farmer (SF): The eye thing is a deep knowing, almost beyond words. You just know.
FCM: What is your advice for other couples?
SF: The most important thing is just like the “location, location, location” adage in real estate, it’s giving each other “appreciation, appreciation, appreciation.”
DV: It’s really important to have many things in common. The whole idea that opposites attract doesn’t work in maintaining relationships, because it is commonality that keeps you connected. It’s very challenging, for a spiritual person to be in a relationship with someone who is not on the spiritual path.
SF: Get over any conflict as quickly as you can. Just get through it. Don’t get bogged down with who’s right and who’s wrong.
FCM: What form do you think the families of the future will take? Will there be a return to traditional family structure or a new form such as an eco-village structure?
DV: What I see is a perfection of what we have right now, where both partners are encouraged to find their true hearts’ desires. There’s a flavor of having it all, right now, having the kids, the great career, the great home and the great vacation. I see that being refined.
FCM: Do you think divorce rates will continue to increase or will people work out relationships so that families stay together?
DV: I think a lot of divorces and miss-matched marriages occur because of intoxicants. When people drink or use a lot of drugs, they’re not in their right minds! In some cases however, I think divorce is healthy. Bad relationships serve a purpose. When the purpose is over, it’s time to move on.
A good marriage is a function of collectively getting sober, exercising more, eating better and taking better care of our bodies. We’re all starting to understand that there is a strong connection between taking care of our bodies and how we are in life. All these things make a profound difference in relationships.
FCM: How do you define an enlightened relationship?
DV: I define it as both partners being authentic, present and aware. It doesn’t have to do with talking about angels or New Age topics. It has to do with having the courage to show up, and be yourself with the other person. It’s also honoring yourself and that’s having the courage to say what you feel, right in the moment. Being honest.
In so many partnerships, what happens is that you aren’t honest with your love partner; instead you run and tell your girlfriends, or your man friends, what you feel about your partner. It doesn’t matter how spiritual you think you are, if you’re doing that, it’s not an enlightened relationship.
SF: There are two things we need to do in life, breathe and show up, and everything else follows. Be Present and Be Here Now. When two people are aware or awakening, have a commitment to the awakening process, then you can’t really go too wrong. The other thing is for those of you who wish to be enlightened, lighten up! We’ve been so serious in our spiritual pursuit. It really is much simpler than that.
FCM: How will you spend Valentine’s Day this year?
DV: Because we travel so much with our teaching schedules, we’ve kind of overdone the restaurant deal, so it’s really a treat to stay home.
SF: Doreen will make a meal at home and I will get her stargazer lilies!
FCM: What are the qualities you love about Steven?
DV: He is my rock: so strong, yet so gentle. He’s a manly man! His voice, also. He’s a good example of being spiritual without losing one’s masculinity.
FCM: What are the qualities you love about Doreen?
SF: She’s beautiful and she’s a good cook! Also she’s intelligent and she has an amazing capacity for love. She’s gorgeous inside and out. She’s the real deal and very unpretentious. She’s a Girly Girl.
DV: This is a message to women: Don’t give up. There are really good, awesome men out there. Keep visualizing, affirming, and praying. Follow your guidance. If you’re praying for a soul mate and you get guidance to do something like go to the gym or take good care of your body, do it. That’s what I had to do. I was guided to go to yoga class (which I really did not want to do), where I met Steven. It’s not like you pray for a soul mate and the doorbell rings and he shows up. My experience in doing readings with women who are manifesting a soul mate is that after praying about it, then they get guidance that they must follow, to take action steps.
I worked with one woman in Texas who’s now very happily married with a child. I told her the same thing and her guidance told her to get up out of bed one night, put on her make-up and go to the local drugstore. She obeyed the guidance, even though it was totally illogical, and she bumped into her future husband in the drugstore!